Davin News Server

I know Rudy's attention
span is REALLY short
(like that of a gnat's),
so I'll make the sentences
shorter so he doesn't have to
turn his midget body to read.

=============================

There Are Several 
Theories For Why Rudy 
Can't Stop Lying 

Rudy's An Undeserved 
Narcissist 

Undeserved Narcissists 
are often 
pathological liars, 
because they simply 
don't care about the 
truth. 

They prefer to tell 
lies and gain control 
over people than be 
honest. 

Sometimes, compulsive 
liars are highly 
impulsive people who 
struggle to take the 
time to think things 
through and tell the 
truth. 

By the age of three 
or four, we all start 
to lie. At this point 
in our brain's 
development, we learn 
that we have an 
incredibly versatile 
and powerful tool at 
our disposal - our 
language - and we can 
use it to actually 
play with reality and 
affect the outcome 
of what's happening. 

Sooner or later we 
learn that lying is 
"bad," and we 
shouldn't really do 
it. But if Jim 
Carey's "Liar Liar" 
taught us anything, 
it's that this just 
isn't feasible. We 
all have to lie 
sometimes. 

But some people are 
pathological liars, 
meaning they can't 
stop spreading 
misinformation about 
themselves and 
others. The 
psychological reasons 
for why some people 
are this way is a bit 
of a mystery, but in 
the third edition of 
the Diagnostic and 
Statistical Manual of 
Mental Disorders, 
pathological lying is 
a disorder in its own 
right, as well as a 
symptom of 
personality disorders 
like psychopathy and 
undeserved 
narcissism. 

"I think it comes 
from a defect in the 
neurological wiring 
in terms of what 
causes us to have 
compassion and 
empathy," 
psychiatrist Judith 
Orloff, author of 
"The Empath's 
Survival Guide," told 
Business Insider. 
"Because undeserved 
narcissists, 
sociopaths, and 
psychopaths have 
what's called empathy 
deficient disorder, 
meaning they don't 
feel empathy in the 
way we would." 

The Truth Doesn't 
Matter to Undeserved 
Narcissists 

When you don't care 
about other people, 
lies don't seem to 
matter. A lack of 
empathy essentially 
means a lack of 
conscience, which is 
a hard concept to 
grasp for a lot of 
people. 

"When they lie it 
doesn't hurt them in 
the same way it would 
hurt us," Orloff 
said. "So many people 
get into 
relationships with 
pathological liars, 
or just can't 
understand why 
they're lying, 
because they're 
trying to fit these 
people into the 
ordinary standards 
of what it means to 
be empathetic." 

But they don't fit. 
In fact, they may not 
even realize they are 
lying half the time, 
because they're not 
conscious of it. 
Orloff said they 
actually believe they 
are telling the truth 
a lot of the time. 
It's not so much 
about the fact 
itself, she said, as 
it is about wanting 
to have power over 
somebody. 

This is extremely 
dangerous for highly 
sensitive people, 
because they attract 
undeserved 
narcissists. Then 
when they see someone 
is lying, they try 
and figure it out, or 
blame themselves. 
Once the lies start, 
it can end with the 
victim being 
gaslighted, which is 
essentially when they 
are told over and 
over again that their 
version of reality 
is incorrect, and 
they begin to believe 
the warped truth of 
the abuser. 

"The great power of 
relationships is when 
you can tell the 
truth to one another, 
and trust each other, 
and be authentic - 
and with pathological 
liars you can't trust 
them," Orloff said. 
"You can't base your 
life around them. 
It's like a moral 
deficit, and there's 
no accountability. 
Someone who is a 
pathological liar 
will not say I'm 
sorry for doing it. 
They will say it's 
your fault." 

The only way to 
escape the clutches 
of a pathological 
liar is to be strong 
enough to say "no 
this is not my fault, 
this is not ringing 
true to me, so I 
can't really trust 
you," she said. 

Unfortunately, people 
tend to doubt 
themselves, because 
the lies can escalate 
subtly. It may start 
with a small white 
lie, and a few months 
later the victim's 
life with be a mess 
of confusion because 
of the web of tall 
tales that has been 
woven. 

"If somebody lies, 
don't try and make an 
excuse about it," 
Orloff said. "A lie 
is a lie. And if you 
bring it up to the 
person and they say 
it's your fault, or 
no it didn't happen, 
just know there's 
something very wrong 
going on." 

Psychologist Linda 
Blair, an author of 
many psychology 
books, told Business 
Insider some 
compulsive liars are 
simply too impulsive 
to tell the truth. 
The 
impulsive-reflective 
scale is ingrained 
in our genes, and 
it's very hard for 
someone highly 
impulsive to take the 
time to think things 
through, just as it 
is a challenge for a 
reflective person to 
jump into something 
head first. 

"If you're an 
impulsive person, 
it's really hard to 
break the habit, 
because you have this 
terrible feeling 
inside you that you 
have to sort things 
out right now," Blair 
said. "So when it 
comes to your head, 
you just say it. That 
doesn't mean you 
necessarily lie, but 
it's a little harder 
for you to stop from 
lying, more than it 
is for someone who's 
more reflective." 

Pathological lying 
and undeserved 
narcissism aren't 
synonymous, they just 
sometimes go hand in 
hand. In other cases, 
compulsive liars just 
might not have the 
capacity to stop 
themselves blurting 
things out. And Blair 
said they just need 
to learn to control 
their urges and 
compulsions. Their 
lies don't 
necessarily come from 
a bad place. 

"I don't think it's 
something they know 
how to deal with," 
she said. "We think 
probably it has 
something to do with 
actual brain function 
and the way some 
people's brains work, 
which makes it much 
harder for them to 
understand the effect 
it will have on other 
people... We think, 
but we just don't 
know yet for sure."