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On Thu, 23 Oct 2025 15:26:51 -0700, The Undeserved narcissist Rudy 
Canoza says... 

Woe, is me. I can never live up to what other people have done. I'm just 
a creepy IT guy who has *NEVER* been a 3 sport letterman, *NEVER* been a 
bouncer, *NEVER* been an assistant golf pro, *NEVER* been a lifeguard, 
*NEVER* dunked a basketball, because of his puny stature, *NEVER* been a 
college baseball AND basketball player, and *NEVER* dated the captain of 
the cheer-leading squad as a SOPHOMORE in high school. 

LOL 

> > On Wed, 22 Oct 2025 10:00:05 -0700, Rudy Canoza says... 

> > > > > Fuck off and die 

Show us how, pussy. 

> > > > you cocksucking squat-to-piss do-nothing zero-achieving faggot.
 
> > > Only a small child would say that... while looking in the mirror. 

> You lose again, AlleyPussyBitch. 

Oh yeah, short-shrift? How? By you snipping all what someone else wrote and 
declaring yourself everything that you are not? 

LOL... no... in the eyes of Usenet, writing the way you do and snipping 
things that make you look like a low-class liberal... 

... YOU are the loser. 

You also lose, because you're too stupid to offer any refutations... 
simply snipping what's posted and declaring yourself the winner and 
calling yourself names and giving yourself titles you can never live UP 
to, mainly because you're too short to be anything other than be a court 
jester and an IT's cable runner, because your small enough to go where 
normal-sized people can't. 

LOL 

================================================================ 

AlleyCat is one of the several people who dominate Rudy on a daily 
basis, keeping their bootheels on his little pencil neck to the 
amusement of all. 

Rudy's, Dilemma: He Can Dish It Out, But Crawls Upstairs and Cries To 
Mommy When Someone Shows Him For What He Is... An UNdeserved Narcisist 

"When Criticized, narcissists, like Rudy, Show Himself Woefully 
Incapable of Retaining Any Emotional Poise, Or Receptivity." 

Sure, Rudy Thinks That Many Defenses Protect Him, But He's Only Fooling 
Himself... It's a Cry For Help 

The Basics: 

What Is Narcissism? 

Find A Therapist Who Understands Narcissism 

(Usenet is Rudy's therapist and therapy... you're welcome) 

Such a universal tendency is elevated almost to an art form with those 
afflicted, like Rudy, with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). 

When criticized, Rudy the narcissist, shows himself woefully incapable 
of retaining any emotional poise, or receptivity, and it really doesn't 
much matter whether the nature of that criticism is constructive or 
destructive. He just doesn't seem to be able to take criticism, period. 

(Rudy can't go to bed or sleep, if there's an article left dangling, 
that shows him to be the undeserved narcissist that he is, hence his 
replying to EVERY article, as if THAT shows me... LOL) 

At the same time, Rudy the disturbed individual, demonstrates an 
abnormally developed capacity to criticize others ("dish it out", so to 
speak to "him", even going as far as not even writing on the topic at 
hand). 

(giggle... PERFECT) 

Although Rudy the narcissist can't, or won't, show it, all perceived 
criticism feels gravely threatening to him - the reason that his 
inflamed, over-the-top reactions to it can leave us surprised and 
confused. 

(not really.. it IS Rudy, after all) 

Deep down, and clinging desperately not simply to a positive but 
grandiose sense of self, Rudy feels compelled at all costs to block out 
any negative feedback about himself, (hence the never-ending replies to 
ANY article about him.) 

Rudy's dilemma is that the rigidity of his defenses, his inability ever 
to let his guard down, guarantees that he'll never get what he most 
needs, which he himself is sadly oblivious of. 

To better grasp why narcissists, like Rudy, , like Rudy, are so ready to 
attack others and so unable to deal with being attacked himself, it's 
useful to understand something about his childhood. 

People aren't born narcissistic-it's powerful environmental influences 
that cause him to become so. 

(BINGO!) 

As a caveat, however, I should add that no single theory adequately 
accounts for every instance of NPD. The explanation I'll be offering, 
though seminal among those proposed, is still just one of several. But 
even though it's a bit oversimplified, I think it elucidates the 
essential dynamic of the narcissistic defense system better than any of 
the theoretical alternatives. 

Briefly, while growing up, future narcissists, like Rudy, had many 
reasons to doubt whether he was good enough. 

Neglected and ignored, or constantly disparaged and berated by his 
parents, Rudy was held to unrealistically high standards of behavior. 

His caretakers were quick to judge him whenever he failed to live up to 
such unreasonable, perfectionist expectations. 

As a result, he couldn't help but feel defective, not okay, and 
insecure, doubting his fundamental worth as a human. 

In most instances, neither did he feel cared about or wanted-as though 
he were factory seconds, to be tolerated but not respected or loved. 

Anxiously experiencing his bond to his parents as tenuous, in his head, 
he cultivated an imaginary "ideal self" (taller and more well-hung... 
LOL) that could get the parental acceptance, even adulation, he craved. 

If narcissistic adults project an air of importance, superiority, 
entitlement, and grandiosity, it's a pronounced reaction, or 
OVER-reaction, to the massive self-doubt that he keep well-hidden 
beneath his self-satisfied facade he present to others. 

Rudy's marked lack of accurate empathy for the feelings, wants, and 
needs of others is all too well known. But what is less appreciated is 
that this deficiency represents an unfortunate consequence of his 
growing up so preoccupied with his own frustrated needs, and emotional 
distress generally, that he could never develop sufficient sensitivity 
to others. Intensely driven to succeed, or at least see himself as 
successful, his focus inevitably became myopic, pathologically 
self-centered. Others simply weren't in his line of (tunnel) vision. 

Without any clear recognition of what's motivating Rudy in his 
relationships as an adult, he continues to seek the encouragement, 
support, and acceptance denied him earlier. 

Yet, however unconsciously, at the same time, he's cultivated the 
strongest defenses against ever having to feel so excruciatingly 
vulnerable again. And so when Rudy criticized, or think Rudy being 
criticized, Rudy is compelled to react aggressively, in the frantic 
effort to avoid re-experiencing the terrible feelings of loneliness, 
abandonment, or rejection he suffered when he were younger. 

It's especially suggestive that two common terms in the psychoanalytic 
literature used to describe NPD are "narcissistic injury" and 
"narcissistic rage." The "injury" results from his parents' deficiencies 
in being able to adequately nurture him, and so make him feel loved, a 
prerequisite for self-love. 

This is why he needs to prove himself constantly, arrogantly claiming 
superiority over others that can make himself feel "good enough" to be 
loved. 

"My education surpasses yours by far, "Fix-it guy at Citco." You know 
this." 

"It's a neologism - a very good one at that. It describes when a highly 
literate person like me inadvertently - and *rarely* - uses the wrong 
word." 

But ironically, it serves in time only to alienate others. (duh) 

It's precisely this need to be viewed as perfect, superlative, or 
infallible that makes Rudy so hypersensitive to criticism. 

His typical reaction to criticism, disagreement, challenges can lead to 
the "narcissistic rage" that is another of his trademarks. 

"I'm probably wasting my time, because stupid, plodding, 
knuckle-dragging right-wingnuts are not amenable to instruction..." 

"Jane, you rancid mackerel-reeking cunt." 

To protect his delicate ego in the face of such intensely felt danger, 
Rudy's decidedly at risk for going ballistic against his perceived 
adversary. 

This indicates why his artificially bloated sense of self is so fragile. 
Given the enormity of his defenses, he regard himself not on a par with, 
but above, others. 

Yet Rudy's mortally threatened when anyone dares question his words or 
behavior. Ancient fears about not being accepted are never that far from 
the surface, which is why narcissists, like Rudy, must forever be on his 
guard with anyone who might disbelieve or doubt him. For any external 
expression of doubt can tap into his own self-doubts. 

And this is why, though he can certainly "dish it out", he just can't 
"take it" himself. Obviously, if the child self was unequivocally 
convinced about his basic acceptability-adequately integrated into his 
adult self-he wouldn't need to boast about his accomplishments, or 
vehemently debate anyone who took exception to his viewpoint. But 
narcissists, like Rudy, see his best defense as mandating a good 
offense. 

To sum up the above, when criticized, narcissists, like Rudy, can begin 
to experience anxiety or degradation. A certain shame at his 
non-family-bonded core may rise perilously close to consciousness. By 
way of safeguarding himself from such never-resolved feelings of 
worthlessness or defeat, Rudy's likely to react to present-day threats 
with contempt or defiance, or with verbal violence frequently referred 
to as narcissistic rage. 

Exquisitely susceptible to criticism because it endangers his frail 
sense of internal validation, he takes great pains to devalue or 
invalidate the person criticizing him. To achieve such a dismissal, 
he'll do everything possible to negate their viewpoint. 

This can include much more than blaming or indignantly challenging him. 
When Rudy's position has been exposed as false, arbitrary, or untenable, 
he will suddenly become evasive, articulate half-truths, lie, flat-out 
contradict himself and freely rewrite history (making things up as he go 
along). 

This is why at such times, he doesn't seem like an adult, so much as a 
6-year-old. 

And in fact, when others inadvertently trigger mini emotional crises in 
him, there's little doubt that, both cognitively and emotionally, he can 
regress. 

So what's the final cost of all of Rudy's efforts to ward off what 
constitutes for him the unbearable sting of criticism? As already 
suggested, it's immense. Though not consciously realized by him, his 
heart's deepest desire is to form an intimate bond with another that 
would successfully address the huge void left by his parents' 
denigration or neglect. 

But because Rudy's so strongly motivated to avoid re-experiencing this 
keenly felt hurt, his overpowering defenses prevent him from letting 
anyone get close enough to assist him in recovering from his pain. 

(poor mommy!) 

A pain that he conceals quite as much from himself as others.